Media portrayal of domestic violence victims only furthers harmful stereotypes and stigmas. Victims are often portrayed as weak and submissive or as vengeful and even unstable, and this can carry over into society’s perception of them.
All too often in television and film we see variations of two basic scenarios. It usually goes something like this: Woman meets man, they fall in love and get married but then suddenly he changes. From here the story will take one of two turns. Variation one is that she befriends (usually) a man that her husband has no relationship with. He is kind and attentive and begins to notice the bruises and the husband’s temper. The new friend decides something must be done and he saves this woman from her husband, then they live happily ever after.
The other basic option for a victim’s story is that she “snaps” and seeks her revenge in one of two ways. Like the Lifetime show, she “snaps” and kills him when she can’t take anymore. Then there is the movie version where she trains for months and goes back to seek her revenge — think Jennifer Lopez in “Enough.”
The reality of leaving an abusive relationship is far different for most women and their children. Restraining orders can be sought, some women end up in shelters, some go to live with their families.
The reality of leaving an abusive relationship is far different for most women and their children. Restraining orders can be sought, some women end up in shelters, some go to live with their families.
Getting out of these relationships isn’t as simple as getting away from a bad person. Ending a marriage over abuse means walking away from someone you love. Taking children out of the situation means those kids may never have a relationship with one of their parents. Moving out of your house doesn’t always mean you have somewhere to go so you move into a shelter.
Think about it this way: You’re being chased in the dead of night by an unseen predator when you run up on a sheer cliff. You have two choices — you stay where you are or you jump. There is no way to know where you’ll be landing of if the jump will even get you away from what’s chasing you.
All too often the situation far more complex than most of us know and “happily ever after” sold to us by Hollywood is just a load of crap.
